Everything Wrong With The Amazing Spider-Man is an EWW video for the 2012 film, which premiered on December 11, 2012. It is the first EWW video as well as the first video on the CinemaSins YouTube channel.
Transcript[]
- This movie exists
- Child actor looks nothing like his (older) counterpart
- Unsettling scalp-sniffing fetish
- Promotes stalking
- Scene does not include lap dance
- High school student has Rear Window poster
- Uncle Ben picks up perfectly solved Rubik’s Cube & then puts it back messed up!
- Peter Parker uses Bing?!
- Dr. Curt Cockings
- How & why is he surfing the search results inside of (an) iFrame on the Bing page?
- Oscorp uses Disney ride narration for exposition purposes
- Peter’s love interest conveniently also works for the bad guy
- Nonexistent full-color floor-to-ceiling hologram technology
- Peter bumps into the one shady dude with papers related to his father’s work
- Peter perfectly mimics a complicated security touch-screen gesture after watching from 50 feet away
- Floor-to-ceiling holograms, but no security cameras
- Peter willingly walks into a room with hundreds of spiders
- Skateboard reappears after not having existed the entire previous sequence
- Peter uses Bing again!
- Nonexistent floor-to-ceiling hologram-that-you-can-touch technology
- More Uncle Ben lectures about responsibility
- Long-abandoned underground wrestling ring perfectly positioned to give Peter costume inspiration
- Wait… is it Christmas?
- Random microchip in a cell phone equals police scanner
- Why are all these random citizens gathering outside the police station?
- Peter uses Bing for a third freaking time
- Magic car-door key-code decoder gizmo
- Peter somehow knows exactly which car this dude is going to steal
- Supporting role given to C. Thomas Howell, but not Bruce Campbell
- Spiderman takes off his freaking mask
- Police captains don’t issue arrest warrants, judges do
- Stupid rat lizard puppet
- Ridiculous pied piper lizard effect
- “Property of Peter Parker” plot device
- What the f*** is up with these wounds?
- Peter takes off the mask again
- Cell phone reception in the sewers
- Evil villain lair, conveniently left unattended
- Custom-built presentation software created solely to provide crucial plot details
- Exposition by police radio
- Use of the phrase “Mother Hubbard”
- Peter’s mask comes off again!
- Exposition by helicopter pilot
- ”Turning the cranes” should be the new “Jumping the shark.”
- Bro bonding eye contact moment
- Spiderman is not a parade; you do not need to stop traffic for Spiderman
- Canisters of liquid nitrogen should not be stored on rooftops
- Worst. Secret. Identity. Ever.
- Crazy whipping liquid nitrogen tube conveniently lands right in Spiderman’s hand
- Villain change of heart cliché
- Fatally wounded, but still time for a moral lesson
- The funeral invitation read: black tie, black umbrellas only
- These ladders do not begin to provide enough support or height for a painting of this scale
Movie Sin Tally: 53
Sentence: HELL